Input from the Other Half

1:35 PM Posted In , , , , , Edit This 0 Comments »
Since I am planning a homebirth in July, I have been looking alot at online forums looking through the experiences of others'.  I am reading some incredibly inspiring stories and getting some great advice but I am also noticing something that has got me thinking about how much input I give my other half. 

It started with a discussion thread on The Bump in which a Mum-to-Be was inquiring about hospital policy on epidurals during a water birth.  This woman wanted to have a water birth but her HUSBAND insisted that she have an epidural...and this way okay.  Afterall, his job was a physicians assistant so he knew better.  Right??

The more I read, and the more people I talk to the more I realise that there is a huge amount of women who are giving up their birth choices to the one person who should be supporting and empowering them...their partner.  To me, that's very sad.

I never considered giving my partner any input on any of my births...but he never assumed he should give any.  I just always figured giving birth is my experience from by body and thus, the decisions of how and where I would do it was always up to me.  I'd expect that if I decided to birth in the backyard, suspended from a tree in the middle of a drum circle with a voodoo priestess, he would trust that was the best thing and support that.  I would be deeply insulted to have him question my judgement.

Now I am not saying that I don't care about how my partner feels.  If he were uncomfortable with my birth choices, I would gladly supply him with some materials to 'get comfortable' but I definitely would not allow for his insecurities and control issues to stand in the way of me and the birth I wish to have.  Birth is the single most personal and life altering experience in a woman's life, and that should not be taken away from her by her partner.

So I want to know what YOU think?  How much consideration, if any, should a man have in his partners birth choices?


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